Wednesday, December 12, 2007

A Skeptic’s Quest – My Testimony Part 6

But you know, I never really had a joy in knowing how great God is until I was truly sincerely able to thank God for my limitations – to thank God for an alcoholic father; to thank God for a stutter; to thank God for poor grammar; to thank God for my home life. Not that I would ever want my children to have it, and they don’t, but that that is where God raised me and placed me to prepare me. And until I was able to say “Thank you,” I would never have experienced the joy of knowing how great my God is. He took my limitations and turned them into my greatest assets. I am living beyond my limitations. You almost never catch my stutter. Most people never catch it. I still have poor grammar, but most people do not catch it. That is why I speak fast. God used an alcoholic father and a family life to prepare me for who I am as an individual.

People will say to me, “Well, don’t you get a ‘big head’ speaking to larger crowds than anyone in the history of young people – speaking to more university students, high school students?” This year in one night I had the privilege of speaking to sixty-three thousand. They say, “Don’t you get a ‘big head’ from all the books you have written?” My response, and a very sincere response, at least from me, is, “I don’t think so.” You know why? I cannot remember a time since that morning in Wheaton, Illinois (when I gave my limitations to God) to ever putting on a microphone that I was not aware of the grace God. I cannot remember a time ever putting on a microphone that deep in my soul I failed to say, “Thank you, thank you for helping me become one of the premier speakers – yet with my background.” And every day, I am aware of God’s grace. Let me tell you, that has made life exciting. I will sit back sometimes and just almost chuckle about the books I have written and everything else. Here I was at Stanford University, as I said before, the number one rated university in America at that time, and in two nights five thousand students came out, and almost a thousand came to Christ. I remember I was speaking that night, and here were all these erudite people around there, and inside I started to chuckle. I said, “God, I am a walking example of the scriptural truth that You will use the foolish things of the world to confound the wise.” I thought if these people really knew my background--and for years I couldn’t share that because I was sensitive to it--until it really gripped me emotionally how great my God is. He is not looking for ability, He is looking for availability.

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