Divorce and Support

In the process of mourning a divorce or other painful situa­tion, you have three significant needs that can be met by spiritual leaders and Christian friends: comfort, support and encouragement. It is important to be aware of these needs and to allow others to meet them. See blog #35 for comfort.

You need support. You need more than comfort to get through the pain of your parents' divorce. You also need support. What's the dif­ference between comfort and support? People supply the comfort you need when they share your sorrow emotionally. People supply the sup­port you need by helping you during this time in practical, helpful ways with the necessary day-to-day tasks of life that go on even during difficult and painful cir­cumstances. Obey Galatians 6:2: "Carry each other's bur­dens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

You may be tempted to ignore or to refuse the support offered by others. You may feel that you can handle it yourself or you may not want others to be bothered with things you normally do for yourself. Resist that temptation. God put Galatians 6:2 in the Bible because He knows there are times we should rely on the support of others. Let other people do things for you and be grateful for their help.

What if you have a need and nobody steps up to offer help? Ask for it. There is nothing wrong with telling a trusted friend, a youth leader or your minister about your need and asking for help. In most cases, people are more than willing to help out; they just don't know what needs to be done. Feel free to help people support you at this time by letting them know what you need.