Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Primal Instincts

If you ask people why they had sex at fourteen, they might say something like, “I couldn’t help it. The feelings were too strong to control. We were in love, and love means sex.” Like many other adolescents, they don’t understand that sex is not an uncontrollable desire. We are not animals who respond to primal urges without thinking. We are rational beings, created in the image of God, possessing the dignity, worth, and importance He gave us.

Love for adolescents and adults is not just a feeling, an urge. Love is primarily an act of the will, a choice to make the welfare and happiness of another individual more important than our own. And since sex is an act of love, not a primal response, our most important sex organ is not found below the belt—it is the mind. It is here we make decisions. The brain takes in information, sifts through it, accepts some elements, rejects others, and arrives at conclusions. It is in the brain, not in some primal instinct, that the choice is made to engage in sex or to say no to sex. Therefore, to claim that sex is only an uncontrollable urge is to deny our ability to make choices.

Kids need to understand that sex is more of a desire than a drive. It is conditional; we can say no. We are not at the mercy of our sexual urges. But when we give in to the popular notion that sex is merely an act of nature, a physical thrill just for the taking, we encourage the desire for sex.

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