Thursday, June 16, 2011

Dangerous Dan

“I'm here to warn you that not everyone running for governor of our great state believes in the beauty of tolerance," announced candidate Juanita Dunsmuir. Anticipating her meaning, the crowd began to hoot and clap. "His name is Dan Bellardi, but I think he deserves to be called Dangerous Dan." The crowd roared with approval. "Dangerous Dan doesn't want to be governor; he wants to be warden with North Californians as his prisoners. His idea of tolerance is counting to three while you decide to believe what he believes, live the way he lives, and worship the way he worships." Laughter exploded around the arena. "I'm here tonight to say, 'Dangerous Dan, the decent people of North California are not going to let that happen.'"

The chant arose from somewhere in the crowd and rippled quickly around the arena. It happened this way at every concert during Juanita's rousing preamble as if it were planned, which many critics insisted it was. In seconds the throng was singing again, this time to Dangerous Dan Bellardi: "Adios, Tarzan, you ain't good enough for this Jane. We need more than your body, your bucks, and your brain. Your loving ain't love if all we feel is pain. So adios, Tarzan, you ain't good enough for this Jane." The band joined in and the place was rocking again.

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